Differentiation Behavior Inventory

Awareness of experience

• Awareness of bodily sensations, feelings, thoughts, wants; chooses to express or not express those internal states, knowing why in the moment.

Distinguishes between thoughts and feelings

• The capability to recognize the thoughts within the feelings and the feelings within the thoughts
  cf.: Meaning Making

Speaks from an I position

• Takes responsibility for declaring point of view and ownership for the consequences of deciding and acting without impinging the values or beliefs of others.

Describes impact

• The capacity to describe in the moment the emotional impact of another upon self.
  cf.: Interpersonal Gap

Direct address

• Speaks directly to and not about any other member

Accurate self image

• Is aware of competencies & limitations, strengths & liabilities; is able to critique self; knows the difference between confidence and certitude.
  cf.: Stages of Learning

Personal presence

• Maintains a clearly defined personal presence-well defined sense of “self” identity, especially in moments of intense emotionality or ambiguity while remaining in the “hot” emotional field and connected with the other-knows where the self ends and the other begins.

Takes responsibility

• For co-creating experience so that in any experience, a relevant questions are 
  • What is my part here? 
  • How am I co creating what I am experiencing?
  • How might my past be coloring my present?

Congruence

• Extent to which external presentation matches inner experience; behaves naturally and authentically vs pretending to be what they are not.
• The degree to which the espoused theory of the self is more aligned with one’s theory in use.